Tiara Lestari's Personal Journal

My words, my feeling, my memories, my experiences. Mostly, this is me.

Friday, December 02, 2005

Trust & The Golden Rule

Hi everyone. I'm back.

I'm really sorry for the lack of posting last month. I am truly sorry but hope that you'd understand once you finish reading this post.

Writing this post is one of the hardest things I have ever done since I started this blog. It took me so long just to finish one paragraph. Look... I've been having personal issues that I know most of you have gone through and it is never easy. Yes, it's an issue with my relationship.

Relationship is hard. Do you remember how you were first felt the attraction with your partner? Do you remember that moment? First you were attracted to a person, you spent time with him, and things were wonderful, but at some point, it's just like breathing....routine, and you don't think about it. At times, you don't even appreciate it.

I don't know how it started, all I know that it got worst... fast. And instead of dealing with the problem, I chose another path. I took a path which to some people would be considered breaking my commitment as a girlfriend.

To make a long story short, I came back and told my boyfriend what I did. I am certain that a lot of relationships would not survived this episode. What I have done is not something that most partner can easily accept. However, his reaction was not what I expected. Perhaps, he was also deeply aware of the problems we were having as a couple and we both chose different paths to make ourselves feel better. Wrong paths.

That night became the most insightful, honest and -at times- painful moment in our relationship. It was a moment when two people were caught at a crossroad. A moment where the affair of the hearts must be decided now or it would never see the light of day again. A decision was made and we did it together.

For me, that night was the beginning of a new relationship. A relationship which value honestly and respect for each other. We both are going to try to make this relationship work.

Relationship is hard enough even without any problem. You have to work on it and trust is a very important factor, if not the most important. In my relationship, I have broken his trust and now I have to earn back his trust. I know it's gonna take time. But I am going to do everything in my power to do just that because -in the end- I want this relationship to work.

I just finished reading a book from a relationship expert called A Relationship For A Lifetime by Kelly E. Johnson,M.D. He said the golden rule of a relationship is this:

If it works for only one of you, it won't work for your relationship.

I understand that now...