My words, my feeling, my memories, my experiences. Mostly, this is me.
Friday, February 17, 2006
Come join me on Bali Island
Modeling has brought me both joy and pain. It has introduced me to people and places around the globe that at the moment I felt I was still just day dreaming. Modeling also has taken me away.. far far away from the home that I love. I may be living in Singapore, but my home is –and always be- Indonesia.I miss my home, but mostly, I miss my family.
As a girl from a small town in Solo ,Indonesia, I think I am doing more than just okay in my career as a model. Well, not so in my own country. Over there, I am just a flash of names from headlines of yesterday. I am known more as a controversy rather than a model.
That will change on March 12, 2006 in the island of Bali. On that day, I will launch my career in Indonesia with a project so exciting, rewarding yet accompanied by so many potential negative consequences for me. At Grand Mirage hotel located in Benoa, Bali, 20 minutes from the Airport, I will be having -what my manager called - the most daring one model photo exhibition in Indonesian modeling industry entitled “from SENSUAL to ELEGANCE.”
This is not your grandmother’s photo exhibition. First, it will begin at and ends when the sun comes up. Second, there will be music, cool lounge by the beach and –certainly- the sound of Baliwaves accompanying my pictures. It will be soo cool!
But you’re nuts if you think I am not nervous about this event. This is after all, my first time to launch something of this magnitude in Indonesia. Second, I honestly do not know how my countrymen would take me. Will they accept me as a model who is trying to be a better person? Or will they reject me as the queen of immorality trying to come back to country she doesn’t belong?
I don’t know. I do know two things. One, I am going to do it and with the grace of the Almighty, I will be just fine. Two, I want you there. I want you all there with me. So, would you come, please? I will certainly be there…
PS: My management beg me to write the following; Those of you individuals or companies who want to sponsor this event, you still can. Clickhere.
There I was preparing to celebrate the 100K visitor. I was thinking of something smart and original to say.. something very difficult to do for me these days. Then the magic call came from my manager," Tiara," he said, "get ready, you're gonna have a very busy week." I am a pro.. or at least, I am supposed to be one anyway. So I calmly look at my schedule and started to get ready and off we went. Sure enough... all these busy schedule occurred when my 100K visitor actually hit.
So I missed it... my 100k day was just another day in the "office". I woke up, looked at my blog, and it was well passed 100K. Oh well :)
On a serious note, I want to once again thank all of you guys. For being here with me, for saying things to me and to others on my blog. This was my house, but I would like to think of this blog as OUR HOUSE now. Without being overly sentimental about the whole thing.. I do want to say that it means a lot to me that you all are here with me.
Throughout the life of this blog, I always tried to do a couple of things. The first is being as honest as humanly possible. My boyfriend always told me he felt that I bare my soul too much on this blog. I tried. And I hope you can understand that sometimes it is very very hard, especially when I wrote something so personal. It is hard and yet, I felt I do not do you or me justice if I don't at least try to be as honest as I can be. With the exception of a few bad apples, I realize that most of you that come here to get to know me better. So my friends, I promise you that I will try my hardest to remain honest, open, and to continue to write without personal boundaries.
Second, as ugly some of the comments made on this blog, I tried my best not to delete them. I have done it twice. Once was a guy who tried to promote websites to "buy" Indonesian models. No discussion there. Second was those ugly comments made using my name. Aside from these two, I have never ever deleted any comments. When you see "comments deleted by author", that means the writer of the comment deleted his or her comment, not me.
I strongly believe this blog should be a place where battle of ideas is fought so bravely by heroes and zeros alike. Where those who want to hug me digitally mingle with those who want to spit at my face. I am here, with my clothes on and my brain naked to the world. Get used to it. I welcome you even if you think I am the ultimate whore that has sold my soul to the devil. Say what you want to say on the comments box, and I will be hearing, reading, considering, and -at times- responding to you.
This experience of having a blog has been an interesting one. It is a learning experience that I would like to share with others like me. Others who are currently and in the future would like to make a living with their pretty faces. Yes, for you other models.. join me and start to write on my new blog. I have created this new blog for other models so they can start experiencing what I have experienced the last few months.
If you are a model who would like to be known for more than just your pretty faces, this new blog is for you.
For everyone else who have been here, communicating, flattering, insulting or talking to me on this blog, once again, thank you for being here. Welcome to our house.
Well, I guess that sort of "magic moment" for any blogger is almost here for me. They are saying to me that 100k unique visitors means something for a blogger.. that I should celebrate... that I am now this big-bad-a%$ blogger now. That I am this.. and that.. and this....
Will I wake up feeling any differently tomorrow? Probably not :)
I will feel grateful that you have visited me though. That one is for sure. Thanks.. and I do mean thank you everyone who have visited me..
I just realize just now that the visitors counter on the bottom of my blog is showing the number 94,473. Being originally from Indonesia, and having majority of my blog visitors coming from Indonesia, I have been told that the number 100,000 visitors mean something over there. What is it mean? I don't know.